|
Trying, How's That Working For You?
by Maureen Staiano
Have you ever found your self mouthing the words ''I'm trying'' I'm trying to get a new job, I'm trying to lose weight, I'm trying to get organized and on and on.
When you ask your husband or wife to pick up something at the store for you is the answer''I'll try'' Or perhaps you ask your child could you please clean up your room and you get ''I'll try''. As I listen to conversations where questions are being asked the response I often hear is ''I'll try''. It reminds me of as kids when we would ask our parents if we could do something and they would say ''We'll see'' which we all knew meant no. It was an unsatisfying phrase, but it gave my parents an out, they didn't have to commit to an outcome.
So that's the question; trying . . . how's it working for you? When you look up the word try in the dictionary the definition is to make an attempt. In a sense this can appear worthwhile making an attempt leaves an impression that positive action is under way. Something is in the works and it gets a lot of people off your back in the short term. Does it really bring satisfying results though?
If you have been trying to achieve something and not getting the results you want perhaps is because with the word try we leave ourselves a trap door for escape if the going gets too tough. Take quitting a bad habit; you might say ''I'm going to try to be on time for work''. You give it a go, you make a serious attempt to leave a little earlier for work, and perhaps it goes well. Then you have a day when you get thrown off track and you are back to being late and can't seem to get motivated to attempt to change the habit again. ''I tried,'' you say ''but it didn't work, I just can't be on time''. Your excuse is there, you gave yourself an out, you tried, and you failed so you don't have to try that again.
What if you were to put a different word in there? What if you were to change try to commit? When you look up the word commit in the dictionary the definition is to do. That is definitely a step up from an attempt at something; it implies that you get the job done. The full force of your intent is behind the word commit and there isn't a trap door for escape.
Making a commitment to do something or complete something may give a more satisfying outcome than trying to do something. If you find that there is something in your life you have been trying to achieve and it hasn't worked, make a verbal or written commitment to accomplish the very same thing. The shift in perspective may be all you need for success.
Maureen Staiano is a Life Coach specializing in working with midlife women and all the wonderful challenges and transitions we experience.Maureen is a also co-author of 101 Great Ways to Improve Your Life Vol.3 and founder of www.MyMidlifeMakeover.com. She lives in beautiful western New Jersey with her husband Jim. Visit her at http://www..Achieveyourdreamcoaching.com for the free report Building Better Confidence and Self-esteem.
Contact the author, Maureen Staiano
, at maureen@achieveyourdreamcoaching.com
.
|
